Homeschooling. 3 kids at home in this tiny space. 3 kids, 2 dogs and a big fat cat.
To all of us who are struggling with things that are too huge to fit into a tiny conversation about “How are you? Ready for Christmas?”,
To all of us who fit an entire breakdown in the space between dropping off one kid and picking up another,
To all of us who missed the memo that in real life friendships and in real life community would be replaced entirely by FB groups and posts (I didn’t get a vote),
To all of us who thought this would be easier… I see you.
Things are in a perpetual state of falling apart and coming back together. And there are math lessons, meals to cook, and bedtimes to manage. Shoes being grown out of, and dishes to do and the perpetual pile of laundry. The journal I want to keep lies empty. The books I want to read gather dust.
But I am meditating. And I am getting up at 5:30 or 6 to do my yoga practice. And I am getting at least 1 red light session in every day (almost) and I am walking back toward health every single day. So I know it’s going to be ok. It’s a long slow path back up to the place I want to be.
If I could be heard I would tell you about Lyme disease. I would tell it without the politics and the misunderstanding. I would tell you what it took from me and what it gave me. I would tell you about dyspraxia and dystonia and retained primitive reflexes and the chem trails of trauma that blasted across the sky of this family.
But that would be a waste of time because honestly everything is going to be ok.